I wanted to share a life. I wanted to do all the mundane things that make up a life. I wanted to be the one you came home to and relied on for love and support. I wanted to snuggle into your arms every night. I wanted a chance to know you at your best and your worst. I wanted to grow old together. I wanted to grow old. I wanted so much.
But most of all, I wanted to be your wife. I wanted that since I was 28. I wanted to stand with you and look in each other's eyes and finally say out loud what was in our hearts and have the world affirm it. Our time ran out. Our love didn't.
We were lucky. It hasn't always seemed like it - nights I was awake with tears running down my face and you were miles away in someone else's bed. But we had a second chance to be friends and lovers. These last years were the sweetest because you were in them.
Saying goodbye to you after we were together was so hard. I never wanted to be apart ... ever. Not then. Not now. I hope you know that deep in your soul. We decided together if anyone was going to suffer because of our love, it had to be us. We knew we were gambling against time. I know it hurts to think about what might have been so I want you to think about what was and what always will be. True love doesn't die and there has never been a truer love than ours.
We found each other once. We'll find each other again. I'll be watching out for you. If I can, I'll let you know when I'm there. I always said I'd move heaven and earth to be with you. We'll see how I do.
There are some things I need you to promise me. Promise you'll find someone you can talk to about us. You're going to need to mourn and it's not going to be easy to hide. Promise you won't see this as the end to anything. Promise you will embrace the rest of your life. Every damn minute of it. Until it's time for us to be together forever.
I'll see you on the other side.....
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